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February 2012 ~ Wake Up Calls
Recently, a friend sent me a list of the top 5 regrets of people who are dying:
- Wishing they had the courage to be true to themselves, not what others expected of them.
- Wishing they hadn’t worked so hard.
- Wishing they had the courage to express their feelings.
- Wishing they had stayed in touch with their friends.
- Wishing they had let themselves be happier.
As I considered those for myself, I was reminded of the times in this life when I have faced death. The first time, I was on a small airplane. I had been working excessively long hours, traveling 100% for my job and recently divorced with two children at home. My heart started palpitating and I couldn’t move as I slowly fainted. All I could do was think about my children and how they would live the rest of their life without their mother.
And, I was not afraid. That struck me as very odd because off and on during my life, I had been afraid of dying. Here I was facing death and I was incredibly peaceful. I had a "near death" experience and was told that "it was not yet time" for me to leave this life. I felt the most joy I have ever felt and while I was not "prepared" to leave my children, I also found that I was very disappointed when I woke up back in my physical body on the airplane.
Needless to say, that event got my attention!! I began to realize that I was killing my physical body through extreme stress. When I talked with my doctor the following week, she was very clear that something needed to change or I would truly be dead from stress if I continued living as I was living. I was able to adjust my work schedule to be at home two days a week and only travel three days a week for my job. It was still stressful, yet at least a start toward a more balanced lifestyle.
Over the next six months, I began to learn how to slow down, how to relax and how to change what needed to change. Over the next few years, my life changed radically compared to what it had been.
A number of years later, I had another ‘near miss’ experience when I was traveling in England with a friend. Driving on the wrong side of the road was not easy and after an "odd" morning, I found myself facing with a huge dump truck about to hit our car right in my face. All I remember thinking is "I’m going to die" and then hearing in my head, "No, you are not. Pay Attention!!" Somehow, without consciously thinking, I managed to hit the gas enough so the truck hit us in the rear of the car instead of right in my face. Luckily, we lived through it.
That message — Pay Attention — kept coming back to me as I tried to figure out what it meant. Over the next few years, my life changed radically again. My work changed and I changed. Eventually, I learned how to be peaceful and to live a more balanced life.
I’ve had a few other "moments" when I wasn’t sure whether this was "my time" or not, though none as dramatic as those two. Each one made me stop and think about where I was and what was important to me.
In life, we sometimes get "wake up calls" that prompt us to STOP, think and pay attention. They are opportunities to re-evaluate where we are, what we are doing and why we are doing it.
This year — 2012 — is a year when many people are pondering what life is all about — will the world come to an end or will we continue on as before or will we do something different?
When we stop to look at where we are, we can see with new eyes and make new choices how we want our future to unfold. Who knows how long we might have on the physical place. So while we may not be completely in control of how long we live, we are in control of how we live.
We have the choice to focus on what is important — for us:
- The chance to be ourselves — to focus our time and attention on what is important for us, not for someone else.
- To make time to balance our work, our rest, our play and our study activities.
- To express how we feel.
- To cultivate the relationships with people who are important to us.
- To be happy and to enjoy the physical life we have here, no matter what is going around us.
This month, I encourage everyone to think about what is important to you and make a firm resolution for this year to change something so that your life is working better for you.
Start with small steps if you are not ready to make a big leap:
- Make that phone call to a friend.
- Tell someone you love them.
- Make time to do something fun.
- Be happy.
- Feel joy at the simple things in life.
- Appreciate the beautiful world all around us.
Have a great month!
ps: For another true story, see the "story behind the book."
If you are thinking about creating sources of income, new business ideas or exploring expansion of a existing business, our book Income Without a Job has some great exercises to assist with that.
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