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A Grandchild's Guide to Using Grandpa's Computer
(Read this to yourself aloud)
Bits Bytes Chips
Clocks
Bits in bytes on chips in box.
Bytes with bits and chips with clocks.
Chips in box on ether-docks.
Chips with bits come.
Chips with bytes come.
Chips with bits and bytes and clocks come.
Look, sir. Look, sir.
read the book, sir.
Let's do tricks with bits and bytes, sir.
Let's do tricks with chips and clocks, sir.
First, I'll make a
quick trick bit stack.
Then I'll make a quick trick byte stack.
You can make a quick trick chip stack.
You can make a quick trick clock stack.
And here's a new
trick on the scene.
Bits in bytes for your machine.
Bytes in words to fill your screen.
Now we come to ticks
and tocks, sir.
Try to say this by the clock, sir.
Clocks on chips tick.
Clocks on chips tock.
Eight byte bits tick.
Eight bit bytes tock.
Clocks on chips with eight bit bytes tick.
Chips with clocks and eight byte bits tock.
Here's an easy game
to play.
Here's an easy thing to say....
If a packet hits a pocket on a
socket on a port,
and the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
and the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort
then the socket packet pocket has an error to report!
If your cursor finds a menu item
followed by a dash,
and the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash,
and your data is corrupted cause the index doesn't hash,
then your situation's hopeless, and your system's gunna crash.
You can't say this? What a
shame, sir!
We'll find you another game, sir.
If the label on the cable on the
table at your house
says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
but your packets want to tunnel on another protocol,
that's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
And your screen is all distorted by
the side-effects of gauss,
so your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse,
then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
cause as sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gunna hang!
When the copy of your floppy's
getting sloppy on the disk,
and the microcode instructions cause unnecessary risc,
then you have to flash your memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM.
Quickly turn off your computer and be sure to tell your mom!
Source / Credits:
This delightful piece came to us in e-mail quite a while ago. We have updated this page based on new information supplied by a website visitor that corrected the origin and the author.
This
poem has been erroneously attributed to Dr. Seuss and apparently copied all over
the world without credit to author. In fact, it was written by Dr. Gene
Ziegler. See http://www.people.cornell.edu/pages/elz1/clocktower/DrSeuss.html
for the history and the full version of the poem. This page is http://www.itstime.com/
Used by permission of the author. � 1994 Gene Ziegler
Page updated: May 11, 2023
