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spike bullet February 2016 ~ Love at Work

Resources (links, books, articles, the lighter side)
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color bulletFebruary 2016 ~ Love at Work

February is the month we celebrate love in the United States so a good time to talk about Love at Work.   

Many people forget that love is a powerful force that can transform people and situations.  I can feel the wheels turning in some heads and people thinking, "How does that happen at work?"

It is safe to say that the business world comes with many challenges and daily frustrations.  Those difficult situations can be transformed by the power of love.

A few examples:

If you have family or loved ones, keep a photo or photos on your desk, on your wall or close by in your office.  When work frustrations seem to be filling your mind, take the time to look at your photo(s) and allow your heart to open and feel the love for the special people in your life.

Remember how much you love that person or those people in your life who bring you joy.  Allow those feelings of love to become more important than whatever is frustrating you.

Then, remember that who ever is frustrating you also loves someone in their life and is loved by someone.  They also have their own daily frustrations and pressures.  They are human and fallible, just as you are.  Just as everyone else on the planet is.  Each person is unique in their own special way.  Every person has talents and gifts that are unique to them.  Therefore, everyone may have different opinions about how to handle situations.

When you can see other people as human beings who are loved and loving, interacting with them at work can be much easier.  The tension can be greatly reduced and you can both work out your differences in a way that is productive and satisfying for both of you.

Most of us create stories in our head about what is wrong or why something is wrong or who is to blame for something.  We create those stories unconsciously and very quickly, and then we believe they are real – instead of just stories that we made up.  And, we create negative emotions to go along with those stories we have created.  Then, we act as if the stories were real and that other people are our enemies.  That leads to more conflict, more anger, more stress and less productivity in the workplace or at home.

Because we created the negative stories, we can also create new stories and change our emotions to positive ones once we realize what we are doing.  This is one of the key elements of the Crucial Conversations "Master My Stories" skill.

By focusing our own attention and emotions on who we love instead of someone that we feel is "doing us wrong," our attitude shifts and we can more easily deal with difficult people and difficult situations.  If we can take the time to get to know them better as people, we can find a way to common ground, common interests and common goals.  That leads to more effective team work and smoother work relationships.

It does take practice to make this shift in our thinking and feeling and acting.  The benefits are incredible over time — less stress and worry, fewer blow-ups and much more time spent in productive endeavors instead of in worry or anger.  All of those lead to better health and vitality overall.

Taking the time to adjust our attitude and our emotions also affects those around us and those we care about, and who care about us.  Instead of coming home from work every day feeling angry and frustrated, we can look back at a day where something productive was accomplished.  That is a much better feeling.

Allow love to spend the day with you at work every day this month.  You won’t regret it.

  Internet Resources

book graphic  Books

  • Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High, 2nd Edition.   Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan and Al Switzler.  McGraw-Hill 2011.   ISBN-13: 978-0071771320
  • Crucial Confrontations: Tools for Resolving Broken Promises, Violated Expectations and Bad Behavior.  Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan and Al Switzler.  McGraw-Hill 2004.  ISBN-13: 978-0071446525
  • Transforming Your Dragons: Turning Personality Fear Patterns into Personal Power. José Stevens. Bear & Co; (July 1994) ISBN: 1879181177
  • Wishes Fulfilled: Mastering the Art of Manifesting.  Wayne Dyer.  Hay House, 2012.  ISBN-13: 978-1401937270
  • Income Without a Job: Living Well Without a Paycheck.  Michael Jay Anthony, Barbara J. Taylor.  Lulu.com, 2008  ISBN-13: 978-0-557-00377-8.  Website: www.income-without-a-job.com.  Tap into your own creativity and use  your full potential.  Learn how to see opportunities that others miss.   

world wide web - articles  Articles

Related newsletter articles:
  September 2007 - Crucial Conversations
  November 2015 - How to Get Things Done
  October 2012 - Crucial Conversations Skill: Learn to Look
  June 2008 - the Art of Making Conversation
  August 1997 - Improving verbal communications
  April 2000 - The Art of Listening
 
July 2006 - Giving and Receiving Feedback
 
March 1999 - Dealing with Difficult People
  September 2003 - Dealing with Difficult People
 
July 2000 - Dealing with Co-Workers We Don't Like
  April 2007 - Tips for dealing with workplace jerks
  May 1999 - Respect in the Workplace
 
June 1999 - Personality Dragons
  July 1999 - Slaying the Personality Dragons
 
Seven Principles of Spirituality in the Workplace

smiley graphic  The Lighter Side  

You were born with potential.
You were born with goodness and trust.
You were born with ideals and dreams.
You were born with greatness.
You were born with wings.
You were not meant for crawling, so don’t.
You have wings.
Learn to use them and fly.
  
— Rumi
(from Wishes Fulfilled: Mastering the Art of Manifesting by Wayne Dyer.)

 

About our resource links:  We do not endorse or agree with all the beliefs in these links.   We do keep an open mind about different viewpoints and respect the ability of our readers to decide for themselves what is useful.

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Page updated: January 31, 2016      

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